Vacation from No

I have incredibly fond memories of our family vacations as a child.  My parents, having met as employees of United Airlines, instilled in us an appreciation for travel taking full advantage of our ability to fly for free.  And fly we did.  I accumulated more stamps in my passport by the age of 18 than most do in a lifetime.  With my family I saw the leaning tower of Pisa, sang old Irish tunes with a live band at Oliver St. John Gogarty’s pub in Dublin, and sat in our car in the middle of a pack of elephants on the move in South Africa.  (I do also have incredibly frustrated family vacation memories.  The image of my father’s backpack clad backside, some 20 feet ahead of us, determined to see all of Rome in one day, his family’s fatigue or hunger be damned is forever seared in my brain.)  It is an incredibly great source of sadness for me to know that I won’t be able to provide my own kids with as many trips to new and interesting places as I experienced growing up. 

On the other hand my husband has less than fond memories of family vacations.  His memories include mostly arguing, driving, more arguing and eating at restaurants where no one wanted to dine.  His parents didn’t love to travel; it seemed a general lack of comfort served to bring out the worst in everyone.

So my inability to provide vacation experiences like the ones I grew up with, coupled with my husband’s desire not to provide experiences like the ones he grew up with, left us five years into marriage having taken only one vacation as a singular family unit: our honeymoon.  We’ve traveled, yes.  We’ve visited friends, traveled with my family and have taken vacations with another family, but we had yet to spend an extended amount of time as our own family unit exploring some place new.

We set out last weekend to change that.  Out of the blue my husband booked a long weekend away to Sheboygan, Wisconsin to an indoor water park and resort.  I anticipated this weekend like a child yearning for his birthday.  I counted down the weeks, flipping up the calendar to smile at those words, blue harbor.   I spent the days before our departure running errands to ensure our three and a half days together were special: movies and books from the library, forbidden junk food and treats from Target.  I deeply wanted this weekend to feel special and set apart.  I wanted my family to feel that this was sacred time to relish, enjoy and relax into.

And so it was.  I realized during the planning and preparing process that I had an opportunity to set the tone for our vacation.  My husband and I are both pretty go with the flow, so when we travel with others we often let them set the tone.  We travel with great people, so it’s never really a problem, but I was excited to be the ones to drive the ship.  As I thought about the feeling of the weekend I wanted it to feel like saying yes. 

For better or worse I am a parent who tends to say no more than yes.  Often it’s a necessary no ("no you may not run out into traffic") but I am not above saying no because I just don’t want to deal with the mess (no you can’t use markers- here’s a crayon) or to keep our routine (no buddy, it’s naptime and you’ve already had 3 stories.)  Truthfully, sometimes I say no simply because I fear being over-indulgent.  So this weekend I took a vacation from saying No.  Our routine was loose and I didn’t stress about it. 

Taking a vacation from No meant eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch for lunch. (And pop tarts and pizza and Velveeta shells and cheese)

while wearing your sister's hair clip of course

Going down the water slide

and around the lazy river 15 times.

It meant watching the big trucks work for much longer than Mommy wanted to.

It meant eating corn on the cob even though it was messy,

and watching as much TV as we wanted.

It meant staying up later than usual and sitting on Daddy’s lap during meals and buying crayons at Target because your coloring book from Chili’s is so awesome.

And it was wonderful. 

(Of course if I’d written this post on Saturday night it would have stopped there.  By Sunday I remembered that saying yes to everything creates a monster.  A cranky, ornery, entitled monster.  Still worth every single “yes” though.)


I linked up to the parent hood with this post!  This is my very first link up (and pretty much the first time I've even really shared my blog!) Head over to Fried Okra to see other links in the parent hood!