Thirty-Two Things...

Oh hey there.  Remember when I was awesome in the beginning of 2015 and writing all the time?  Well February happened.  February is pretty much my least favorite month.  It's still cold and dreary and I've been over winter for about two months already at that point.  And this February was lost to sick kids and sick grown ups and I don't know what else.  All I can say is that if you look at my planner for the month of February there are a whole lot of things that were supposed to happen, but never did.  Cleaning my house was at the top of that list.  Anyway, let's just pretend February never happened and I didn't take a six-week blogging break.  Cool?  Thanks.

I had a birthday earlier this week.  This is the first birthday I’ve encountered where I’m actually starting to feel old.  I’ve joked about feeling old around past birthdays and pretended to hate the annual passing of time birthdays mark.  But this year.  This year I’m feeling it.  I Google things like “skin care regimens” and pay attention to all those before and after pictures people post on Facebook because I’m starting to look…older.  And this was the year I started forgetting my age.  I could not for the life of me remember if I was turning 32 or 33.  (For the record it was 32.) (Also for the record, until this year I could never understand how people could forget their age.  How was that possible?  32 years and 3 kids later I get it.)

This year also marked a significant shift in the age of people doing the things that I aspire to do.  There are a few secret, deep down aspirations I hold in my heart.  In the past I’ve watched other women set down paths similar to the one I’ve longed for.  And in the past those women have always been older.  I’ve always had a few years left to start achieving those dreams.  Until now.  I’m more and more aware of women younger than me starting down the paths I’ve dreamed of taking.  It’s making me feel panicked.  Like there isn’t any more room at the tables I hope to occupy and I’m getting to old for those tables anyway.  Anxiety sets in and I begin to believe that I’ve run out of time, I’ll never accomplish anything and my life has been small and uneventful and when I’m 85 I will lament all the things I didn’t do.

So today, in an effort to remind myself that I have, in fact, lived 32 good years thus far I’ve compiled a list of 32 things I DID do before I turned 32.  Kind of the anti- x, y, or z things to do before you turn x, y or z age.  I want to be someone who celebrates what I’ve done.  Who sees the glass, and life, as half-full.  So in an effort to be kinder to myself I’m focusing on this list.  I’d love to hear your own list.  Maybe it’s not 32 things, but what have YOU done in your years thus far that makes you proud?

 Thirty-Two things I did before I turned Thirty-Two:

      1.)  Backpacked through Europe

      2.)  Lived in the one place I always said I wanted to live

      3.)  Got my masters

      4.)  Taught high school English to a challenging group of kids, and loved it (and them)

      5.)  Stayed out all night dancing in Spain 

      6.)  Celebrated St. Patrick’s Day in Dublin

      7.)  Became a mom 

      8.)  Got married

      9.)  Made the kind of friends I always hoped I would

      10.)   Found myself in the back of a police car

      11.) Got a tattoo

      12.) Changed careers

      13.) Started writing publicly

      14.) Helped kids fall in love with reading

      15.) Lived alone

      16.) Lived with strangers 

      17.) Waitressed (poorly) at a diner

      18.) Ran three marathons

      19.) Learned how to cook 

      20.) Taught a different group of high school kids about God and loved it (and them)

      21.) Said no when it was hard to do

      22.) Said yes when it was hard to do

      23.) Zip lined in Costa Rica

      24.) Nurtured relationships with my girlfriends

      25.) Learned how to host a great dinner party, and opened my home to others every chance I got

      26.) Leaned into vulnerability

      27.)  Learned how to advocate for my kid when he needed it

      28.) Got tipsy with my husband on date nights

      29.) Made a commitment to God and continued to work at that commitment even during seasons I  didn’t want to

      30.) Made peace with the things I’m not and the things I don’t do

      31.) Mourned the loss of my dad

      32.) Lived thirty-two years with very few regrets in regard to the decisions I made, the ways I treated people, and the person I was

       So how about you?  What's on your list?